Fun for the music nerd who doesn't check in anymore.

There are supposedly 75 bands represented in the picture. I honestly can't stand to wait until the myspacemen have passed it along, ONE EACH, and come up with all of them. Bah. Test yourself, it's fun. Or don't, in the case of the invisible man.

Hm.

You Should Be a Film Writer

You don't just create compelling stories, you see them as clearly as a movie in your mind. You have a knack for details and dialogue. You can really make a character come to life. Chances are, you enjoy creating all types of stories. The joy is in the storytelling. And nothing would please you more than millions of people seeing your story on the big screen!

What Type of Writer Should You Be?

Oh, there I am, working hard just to hold up my afro let alone write a prize-winning screenplay.

I might feel better about this quiz result if only the test had actually asked for a sample of my work instead of asking questions like, "What reaction do you like to inspire in people?" Uh... "Awe." Yeah. Who doesn't?

Now, who wants to lend me some money to produce a teeny film?

Grobalization is Good

I bought a computer desk that is clearly one of the many mass produced cheap pieces of crap we are importing by the ton, literally, from China. I watch the ships roll in and out of New York harbor daily when I take the dog for a walk, all of them loaded with containers, hauling their junk. Sometimes it is like sitting back and watching the country empty its pockets for some skins, or in this case bobble-head dolls or a cheap place to rest my monitor, as if four hundred years later we cannot see any more clearly. Why have we shut down the plants and factories that used to manufacture somewhat quality products? Why is the country littered with delapidated means of production rendering us fat, lazy and unprepared for what our future might bring?



The following one-SIDE of pictures is the entire instruction manual of how to put it together.

And the instructions for loading from the side of the box.


If you happen to be unloading this in the rain, you should probably hold an umbrella over it. Please, no horking it just to make your life easier. Hoist that bad boy! This sike up! And with that, I rest my case.

I'm not going to pull an O'Reilly and suddenly call for a boycott of goods from any one locale, but I think it might help to become a more informed consumer. If companies didn't insist on squeezing out the highest profit margin possible, if there was some semblance of the compassionate corporation that contributes to the community, then perhaps we could strike a balance between competitive pay for workers and well-fed, happy, red-faced tycoons. Right, pinch me. My head must be up my arse.

If only I were king.

Beware the Ides of March... and Friendster

It goes against my grain to be rude most of the time, but I am getting too old for this. I should know better than to be nice to people, especially on 'ster.

I'm guessing this man is visiting the tenth planet or something but this all started when one "XTH" sent me a message that read, "Does your dog know any tricks?" Suckered into conversation about possibly my favorite thing, I responded amiably.

Hello Unpronounceable Man,

If 'growl at the stranger' and 'chase down the
dog on the block' are considered tricks these
days, then sure, she's accomplished.
:-P
I sell her short actually. She's smart, but
surly. Knows her right from her left. Thank you for
asking. I'm sure you already know, if there's
a subject any pet owner adores, it's their bub.
You wouldn't happen to have any pals, would
you?

- crabby

XTH then writes back.

We all want a storybook romance, but as you
have probably learned by now, too many of these
romance have unhappy ending. TaTa

Say wha?

Who said anything about romance? I was
talking about a dog.

sigh.

And that XTH character again. He's big on the last word.

My words sometime might look like Scrabbler and
my message are sometime passionately admired
by many and dismissed by others. Thanks anyway

I think I got dumped. By a guy who refers to himself as the Scrabbler no less. Perfect if he's a supervillain from the 60s Batman television series. Ker-plunk!

These new lows have been brought to you by the Ides.

Bang My Gong

For eleven dollars, (less if you buy in bulk!) + shipping and handling you too can be dirty sweet. Strangely, I want it, only I worry I would stay home and gnaw at myself instead of using it for the powers of good.

Wait, what?

Though great in theory, there is nothing practically appealing about this. I mean, think about it objectively. However, it has pushed me toward a search for the Smarties garter belt. Now that'd be hot.

What's This!?

we are superheroes, toothpaste for dinner

Oh, excuse me. Forgive the interruption. I'm sure you were enjoying the peace and quiet here of late. In fact, I'm sure that's why you find yourself stopping in, day after day as I just know you do, only to find nothing. You secretly love those moments you allow your eyes to glaze over a familiar picture, perhaps some purple text. Ah, sweet vegetation.

Bah, truthfully, I am tut-tutting myself as I sit here apologizing. I am too naughty! I am as bad as a band I once criticized. Do I think I am some kind of somebody who can afford to stall production in such an egregious way? Good heavens, no.

Rest assured I have many lame excuses for my silence none of which I will bore you with. Instead, I return, re-energized after my expedition into the world of the haiku, and prepared to tell you a sum total of absolutely nothing wise. Today at least.

I will suggest however you run along and try the following generator. Sometimes these things are spot on, sometimes not so much. With this one I found myself saying, "Hey, wow! I would drive a Beetle! I totally would fight against the forces of one M. Jackson with my super bankruptcy skills! Power-attache, away!"

Your Superhero Persona by couplandesque
Your Name
Superhero Name	The Bankruptcy Lawyer
Super Power	Can Cry On Command
Enemy	Michael Jackson
Mode Of Transportation	Volkswagen Beetle
Weapon	Sporks
Quiz created with MemeGen!